Hurrah to Spinsterhood

de bene esse: literally, of well-being, morally acceptable but subject to future validation or exception

The role models who preceded the 1960s Women's Liberation Movement, when society dismissed spinsterhood as a tragic fate and offered women few opportunities to earn a living. From Joan of Arc and Queen Elizabeth I of England to Wuthering Heights author Emily Brontë and American Red Cross founder Clara Barton, these and many other resourceful unwedded women may never have achieved their remarkable legacies had they taken the less radical route of marriage.

 

Jane Austen (1775-1817)

Considered by many as the mother of “chick lit,” English novelist Jane Austen was engaged once for a few hours before breaking it off. In 1814, Austen advised her niece in a letter, “Anything is to be preferred or endured rather than marrying without Affection.”

Austen’s own views regarding spinsterhood may have come through in her novel Emma (1815), when the eponymous character refutes the belief that old maids have nothing to do: “[M]ine is an active, busy mind, with a great many independent resources; and I do not perceive why I should be more in want of employment at forty or fifty than one-and-twenty.”

 

Susan B. Anthony (1820-1906)

American civil rights leader Susan B. Anthony began her career as a teacher, earning four times less than her male colleagues. She devoted the rest of her life to canvassing the country to build support for women’s suffrage.

Disdainful of the notion that wives were inferior to their husbands, Anthony said, “I think the girl who is able to earn her own living and pay her own way should be as happy as anybody on earth. The sense of independence and security is very sweet.”

Fourteen years after Anthony died, her efforts reached fruition with the Nineteenth Amendment, which protects a woman’s right to vote.

 

Florence Nightingale (1820-1910)

English nurse Florence Nightingale created the world’s first secular nursing school and made her life’s work advancing social and sanitary reforms. She won renown during the Crimean War for her tireless caretaking of wounded soldiers. Preferring to concentrate on her nursing calling, she rejected all marriage proposals.

 

 

Emily Dickinson (1830-1886)

That American poetess Emily Dickinson lived as a recluse did nothing to temper the romance and passion infusing her words. Or, as she wrote, “To love is so startling it leaves little time for anything else.” Despite her seclusion, her letters show that she cultivated close friendships with various men.

 

 

Louisa May Alcott (1832-1888)

American novelist Louisa May Alcott’s poor upbringing drove her to eschew marriage in favor of earning her own living. She proclaimed in an 1856 journal entry, “I love luxury, but freedom and independence better.”

And four years later, after Alcott visited her newlywed sister’s honeymoon cottage, she recorded in her journal, “Very sweet and pretty, but I’d rather be a free spinster and paddle my own canoe.”

Alcott’s sensibility shines through in the character of Jo March, the heroine in her masterpiece, Little Women (1868), when Jo refuses her friend Laurie’s marriage proposal despite his wealth.

 

Mary Cassatt (1844-1926)

The American painter Mary Cassatt is best known for touching Impressionist renderings of mothers nurturing their children. But in life, she chose to concentrate on her profession at the expense of having her own family.

Cassatt said, “I am independent! I can live alone and I love to work.”

 

Coco Chanel (1883-1971)

French fashion designer and businesswoman Coco Chanel sold simple and elegant ladies’ apparel that did not require corsets. In the process, she revolutionized fashion and helmed her own brand that employed thousands.

She once told her writer friend Paul Morand, “I was my own master, and I depended on myself alone.” Though Chanel never married, she enjoyed several romantic relationships over the course of her long life. Chanel’s explanation for turning down the 2nd Duke of Westminster’s proposal was, “There have been several Duchesses of Westminster. There is only one Chanel.”

 

 

Greta Garbo (1905-1990)

Arguably the most iconic screen goddess of all time, Greta Garbo penned an article in Liberty Magazine in 1932 about how the rigors of film acting preclude a workable marriage: “The only good reason for two people getting married is that they can be together most of the time. That is impossible with me so long as I remain on the screen.”

 

Rosalind Franklin (1920-1958)

We must not hail James Watson and Francis Crick without also bowing in reverence to British biophysicist Rosalind Franklin. Her research was instrumental to their discovery of the DNA double helix structure. Franklin was no recluse, but she made work the center of her life, leaving little time for romance. Along with “research scientist,” “spinster” appears on her death certificate.